Have a patriarchal mom and can’t believe? A mother-daughter relationship is very complex. On one side it is the space where the strongest bond of sisterhood is formed. On the other hand, it is also the inception of the vicious circle of generational patriarchy. No doubt mothers play a vital role in building the thoughts and habits of a daughter.
Undeniably, a daughter might feel more comfortable with her mother in knowing about issues that impact women. But if mothers are not feminists who believe in uplifting women, daughters’ dependence on mothers to gain knowledge about women’s life becomes toxic. They are at the receiving ends of the social norms that patriarchy has defined to confine women. As they grow up in age, they begin to confine themselves to the ideas that their toxic mothers implanted in their minds.
So in this article, I am going to point out 13 shocking things that a patriarchal mom tells their daughters to indoctrinate them with the patriarchy that they faced in their own lives.
1.Are you suffering from depression? Get married. You will be cured.
2. Pati parmeshwar hota hai. You must touch his feet, serve him and do whatever he wants.
3. Sex is a bad word. It stains the character of a woman.
4. Don’t talk about your period and its issues in front of your father or brother.
5. Cook, do the dishes and wash the clothes. These are the primary duties of a girl. Not education or employment.
6. Why do you need a master degree? You are educated enough to be selected by a good groom.
7. No need to do a job. How will you manage your children and husband with a full-time job?
8. The inheritors of property are always the sons. No matter what the law says. Sons stay with their parents and they must inherit their business and home.
9. Daughters become paraya after getting married. They should visit their mayka only as a guest.
10. Beta ek do (1 or 2) thappad are normal in a marriage. You need to be strong and not walk out of marriage like a wuss.
11. Divorce is a bad word or decision. A woman’s life is destined to be with her husband. Without husband’s name, her identity is hollow.
12. Why do you wear short clothes or dark lipstick? Do you want to attract boys?
13. Apply ubtans and fairness creams. Otherwise no one will marry because of your dark skin.
Views expressed are author’s own