A Gujarat High Court judge quoted that Facebook fixed marriages are bound to fail while dealing with a case of domestic violence. The said couple had come into contact via Facebook in 2014. They started meeting offline and decided to get married in 2015. But their marital bliss did not last long, as they started having problems within a few months of marriage. The woman filed a case on her in-laws and husband, for demanding dowry, torture and criminal intimidation. The in-laws, on the other hand, approached the High Court to quash the charges. It is while hearing to this plea to overturn the charges, the High Court judge remarked, “This is one of those modern marriages fixed on Facebook and is therefore bound to fail.”
Marriages; Love, arranged or Fixed on Facebook, does not come with a guarantee card
No marriage in India or around the world comes with a guarantee card of success. The couple might have come in contact via parents or society or even social media. But at the end of the day, it is the couple and the families involved on both sides (in case of Indian marriages) which have to make it work.
Even in the said case, the couple carried on their courtship offline, and met in reality, before deciding to get hitched. Facebook here, was a mere medium through which the man and the woman came across each other. Hence, to say that the marriage was fixed on Facebook is not entirely correct.
Also, dating and relationships have long moved out of Facebook into the realm of Tinder and other dating apps. The way we date or get into relationships might have changed, but why we want to commit for life to the person, is a decision which is taken by the concerned individuals.
Are we interpreting the Judge’s comment correctly?
Maybe his statement is a vague comment on the generation which beliefs more in the virtual information provided to it. We love to paint our lives as fun, exciting and cool on social media. We cover our flaws with filters and get rid of our body fat and acne scars with the help of Photoshop.
They approach us for friendship and acquaintance, viewing us from the filter we have put on our lives through our social media profiles.
Thus, here, it is the human trait of resorting to deception, and our perineal desire to appear as if we are leading a happier and more meaningful life than we actually are, is to be blamed.
Social media is too young, to test whether or not relationships initiated on it can stand the test of time. But we have tons of examples where couples who have met on Facebook or Orkut, are in a happy marriage as of today.
We also have examples when arranged marriages, tried and tested by families and society have crumbled in no time.
Also, hundreds of lovers / brides / grooms to be, were duped or looted by rishtas they came across online. So, again, it is the human intent which is to be blamed here, instead of social interaction platforms.
Facebook gives you a chance to interact with people. It helps you connect with long-lost cousins, relatives and friends. It might also give you chance of starting a romantic relationship. Whether or not you take that chance or how you approach it, is all up to you.
As for me, I just want to talk to the judge about Tinder and get a reaction.
Yamini Pustake Bhalerao is a writer with the SheThePeople team, in the Opinions section. The views expressed are the author’s own.