“Oh, I don’t drink," “No, I didn’t have a lot of bfs," and “Ya, I’m still a virgin” These are statements women usually make to avoid being judged, yet these are the same statements men so proudly announce among their peer group. Why? The question is, when will be we done with judging women?
Ye sabhi lines humne aksar ladkiyon ko kehte suna hai, just to avoid judgemental stares from our society. Drinking, partying, and actively dating along with other hundreds of factors are still considered by people to judge if the girl is dignified enough or not.
When will we be done with policing women?
Because if she drinks a lot, parties a lot, has had a lot of bfs, is not a virgin anymore, then of course she can’t be trusted to raise a family, be a mother, a wife or a girlfriend. Because all these are “the boy thing”, sealed with the bro code. And mind you, not only men, sometimes even women judge other women for making such wild drinking or partying plans.
So, to save your reputation, please don’t make any such plans. Men getting out of control, being drunk, getting abusive and conducting themselves inappropriately is a known fact and no one pulls out the harsh magnifying glass to look into such conduct for a man. But, in the case of women, they are supposed to be morally superior models of self-control, especially for their children and family
So, for a man, while these activities might be viewed as a “bad habit” for a woman it becomes a marker of her character, making her a “bad woman." And this idea has even been proposed by Bollywood from the 60s till date, where a woman who does all this is shown as a vamp
Most of our male friends always have some funny and wild stories from their parties, relationships and drinking sessions that they share with all pride and confidence, and we all laugh it out at such stories without raising a single judgy eye.
While if a woman has such stories, it all comes down to her character.
Why do we hold up such high moral standards for women while boys are allowed “to have fun”?
We are living in the 21st century and it's unfortunate to see that still these gender stereotypes are normalised by most around us. Why does the duty of policing and monitoring fall on women while the right to go out and let loose is reserved for men? The problem is not with the women, but it’s with our mindset of demeaning them for living their lives on their own terms.