Why Did Narayana Murthy Not Want Sudha Murthy To Join Infosys?

Narayana Murthy recently expressed regret over not letting his wife, author-philanthropist Sudha Murthy, join his brainchild, Infosys. The co-founder revealed in a CNBC-TV18 interview that one of his biggest regrets was believing that family and profession do not mix. "I was wrongly idealistic, and in some ways, I think, I was influenced a lot by the environment of those days," the 77-year-old businessman said, adding that he condemns that belief now. 

In 1978, Murthy married Sudha Kulkarni, who was the only woman engineer working at Telco (now TATA Motors). In 1981, Sudha gave her husband a seed capital of Rs 10,000 for the foundation of Infosys. She formally asked him to join the company but Narayana then opined that "good corporate governance means not bringing family into it because those days it was only family," in those days. He added that he realised he was wrong because Sudha was and continues to be more qualified than him.

Sudha Murthy On Marrying Narayana

Sudha Murthy has also shared several sweet memories and anecdotes from her life and marriage with Narayana Murthy. In June, during her appearance on The Kapil Sharma Show, she revealed that her father questioned her choice to marry Narayana Murthy who was unemployed at the time.

She shared that she hailed from a middle-class family and that her father, who was a doctor, was concerned about his daughter marrying a man with no job. He was worried about how to introduce him to his friends when they asked what he did for a living.

Sudha Murthy shared that she asked her father to introduce Narayana Murthy as Sudha’s husband. Isn’t that adorable? Helping each other grow personally and professionally, is a kind of intimacy. It would help develop emotional, intellectual, work, crisis, commitment, communication, and so many other intimacies between a couple, and it takes more than sexual and physical intimacy to make a relationship work for a lifetime.

Growing professionally together can fortify the bond between a couple. They could have completely contrasting careers, but supporting each other’s professional endeavours physically, financially, and emotionally (most importantly) can strengthen their relationship. Yes, there will be challenges, but overcoming them, especially financial ones, together as a team can tremendously solidify the relationship.

Marriage isn’t going to be a bed of roses at all times, even if a woman is marrying a financially well-settled man. When a couple has sailed through the hardest times at the initial stage of their relationship, there’s a substantial possibility of them thriving through anything that life throws at them in the future. All it takes is understanding your partner’s dreams, having open and honest conversations, including uncomfortable ones, and supporting each other as a team.

However, in a patriarchal society like ours, it’s mandatory for men to be well-settled before marriage. People find it acceptable for women to be unemployed or earn peanuts during the time of marriage, but it’s not the same for men. Men are expected to have it all figured out before marriage.

Earlier, Sudha Murthy had revealed that she had loaned Rs. 10,000 to her husband Narayana Murthy to start Infosys, and that turned out to be the "best investment" of her life." Men taking a loan from their wives is perceived as shameful and unmanly. But who is society to impose conventional standards for couples to follow? Aren’t relationships about what works best for the couple? After all, it’s just going to be the two of them in the relationship.

Finance is one of the most important discussions a couple should have before taking the plunge, but that doesn’t always mandate that a man be financially stable when he’s getting married. What matters more than the money is he making his passion and dreams come true and putting in the hard work to turn his vision into reality. If he’s waking up each day with the zeal and determination to achieve his aspirations, that’s solid.

So, what if he’s currently not financially established? What if relatives are going to be critical of your choice? Let them talk; they are only going to talk until they find another hot topic to gossip about. Ultimately, it’s our life, and we have to ensure what works best for us regardless of what society says. And who knows, a couple of decades down the line, there will be another Sudha Murthy setting "couple goals" for the future generation!

Views expressed by the author are their own