#Opinion

Everyday Sexism: Remarks Women Hear But Their Husbands Don’t

Remarks Women Hear, Bill NRI Marriages, uniform marriageable age
Since loving is about understanding and respecting, we have more meaningful marriages and romantic partnerships when we stop continuously critiquing women even for the smallest of things without uttering a word of contempt when men do the same things.

Women are always seen as the caregivers who must do their “chores” properly and must keep the house immaculate and engage in all the housekeeping work while managing the office. Men, on the other hand, will not even get themselves a glass of water because they “keep busy.” Where people are daily more separated and alienated from one another, we need values like the understanding of a woman’s fatigue, in order to upgrade compassion in the marriage.

Remarks Women Hear But Their Husbands Don’t

Receiving Unsolicited Comments On Face And Body

“You’ve put on weight,” “You have a new pimple on your right cheek,” – really? The first thing people do is see their reflection in the mirror and get going. Why is it always thought that a woman is too much into her looks? Why is it difficult to realise that the first thing a woman sees is that pimple on her face and her waistline – but hardly cares about it because external appearances do not matter?

Is it not acceptable for a woman to think of her body as just a body which is connected to her brain, and that needs to move to get her work done at the office? Are her qualifications not enough to get her going throughout the day? 

Being Misunderstood As Domestic Help

From being pressured into doing office housework – to being asked to organise events, fetch coffee or take minutes, these are common examples in which women are often forced into doing the inconsequential but low-reward jobs in the office. A  recent study found that women are undertaking most of the charge when it comes to office chores. But while undertaking such work, they do not receive any benefit and if they refuse, they face being looked on unfavourably by their boss and colleagues. When a man says no, he faces no backlash and it is acceptable. A man who does not help is ‘busy’ and a woman is ‘selfish’.

“Good Girl” Is Not An Endearment

If a woman’s in-law calls her a “good girl” it needs to be read between the lines. Does a man get called, “good boy” for showing obedient behaviour? If we find a later opportunity to call that same person a “good boy”, they will never like it. While as long as a woman is concerned, if, even one of her responses is negative, she becomes “insane” and “too lofty” to be “quaint” and “respectful.” Is respecting an in-law for their age and partiality not overrated? Clearly, the “good girl” is uncomfortable with being called so.


Suggested Reading: Ladies, Stop Considering These 8 Sexist Remarks As Compliments


Being Asked About Children

In the 21st century, this is what most people still believe: a life without children is a life unfulfilled, and a woman who is unmarried and childless is “barren” or as Margaret Atwood says, she is “unwoman.” Worse still, if someone takes one look at a woman’s “ringless” left hand and thinks it to be fine to ask her about her personal life and then lecture her why having children is just so important, as if they have a few options regarding “future.” Why does a woman’s self-worth lie solely in the ability to be a “wife and mother.”?

The views expressed are the author’s own.