Make Your Mothers Empowered Feminists. Here Are Ways To Do So

One of worst experiences that a child might witness is their mother’s oppression at the hands of the family or society. Whether it is through domestic violence, verbal abuse, restrictions or prohibitions to chase their dreams, our mothers are oppressed in multiple ways. This not only destroys the lives of the mothers themselves but of their children too who become the witness of harsh realities at a young age. It impacts their mental and physical health as much as it affects mothers. But the best thing that the child as a grown-up adult can do to heal these wounds is to empower themselves and their mothers. Not only should mothers  give feminist upbringings to their daughters but daughters too should make their mothers feminists. So here are few ways how you can empower your mothers:

Help her unlearn the patriarchal upbringing

The biggest reason why our mothers bear with and internalise the restrictions is their patriarchal upbringing. Your mother might consider it right to quit education and job after marriage because her mother or father taught her to. Your mother might find it normal o be abused by husband or in-laws because she saw it happen with her mother too who chose to remain quiet. Your mother might impose restrictions on you because her mother said these are necessary to ensure a safe life for the daughter.

But as an empowered daughter, teach your mother that a woman should never blame herself for the oppression that is imposed on her by the patriarchal society. Tell her that the oppressor should be guilty and punished for outraging the basic rule of humanity, to treat and respect each other as equals. Educate her about gender equality so that she can understand why it is important for her to live a life with dignity. 

Support and encourage her to raise voice against domestic violence

Unfortunately, some of us belong to families where domestic violence and verbal abuse between parents is an everyday reality. We wake up to it and struggle to power through the day with the pain that the violence and abuse inflicted in our hearts and minds. But the only way to heal these wounds and those of our mothers is to stand by her and support her. We all know that domestic violence is a punishable crime and as aware citizens, we should not shy away from stopping the oppressors and raising voice against them even if we love them. We need to encourage and educate our mothers about her legal rights and stand by her when she exercises them.

Support her if she seeks a divorce

It is undeniable that divorce remain a taboo in our society even today. Women are taught to bear with all the injustice and problems within marriage rather than walking out into a world where estranged women have no respect. Amidst this if your mother feels the need to quit her married life, understand her situation and support her. You might be the only person she can seek help and support from. So don't let your love for your mother be overshadowed by societal prejudices that always blame women for a failed marriage.

It would be best if you are the one who encourages your mother to start a new life with dignity after separation.

Help her monetarily whenever possible

Most of our mothers might be housewives who do not have financial power without which a person can never earn respect and equality in our society. Even today, our mothers might have to depend on their husbands for every penny while the husband might be too proud and controlling to allow easy access of his bank balance to his wife. So as empowered and earning adults, help your mothers financially. And also help her become financially empowered and educated so that she doesn’t have to be submissive and accountable for every penny that she borrows from her husband.

Encourage her to restart the education, vocation or job that she quit

It is common among mothers to quit their education or job once they get married or become mothers. They had to give their time to husband and children while their education or job was never considered important. But as empowered daughters, encourage your mothers to enrol in the university again and restart her education. And never think it is too late to start again. Society has given enough examples of how mothers have completed their PhDs or excelled as working women in different fields at an older age.

Yes, the decision might face many oppositions but does a couple of arguments matter more than your mother’s empowerment and happiness? 

Views expressed are the author's own.