‘Exes can’t be friends’ is an age-old statement that has been reiterated by the public and media. People believe that there are only two possibilities after a couple breaks up, maintaining a polite distance or becoming enemies. However, each couple is different and it is possible for exes to maintain a friendship after a breakup.
Hrithik Roshan and his ex-wife Sussanne Khan have maintained a friendship after their divorce and through their changing relationships. Roshan’s rumoured girlfriend Saba Azad and Khan have also built a friendship and are often interacting in real life and on social media.
Khan commented on Azad’s Instagram post and complimented her by saying, “So pretty Saboo”. Azad thanked Khan in her reply and said she loved her holiday stories and asked her to keep them coming.
Sussanne and Roshan are not the only ones who have maintained a good rapport despite the divorce. Celebrities like filmmaker Kiran Rao, and Aamir Khan share a good rapport and the actor also has maintained a good relationship with his first wife Reena Dutta.
What made it possible for them to remain cordial? If they can, why do we believe exes can't maintain a good bond?
Why Do Exes Maintain Their Friendship?
A study showed that about 60% of exes were able to maintain their friendship. According to the research, there are four reasons people stay friends with their exes.
- Security: After spending time together romantically, intimacy builds and is hard to let go of. People can choose to stay friends with their exes because they do not want to lose their ex’s advice and emotional support.
- Practicality: Practicality is another reason people maintain their friendship’s with their exes. Financial reasons and the involvement of children are two reasons people maintain their friendship.
- Civility: People continue their friendship with exes because some may want to be polite and not hurt their ex’s feelings.
- Romantic Feelings: If a person still has romantic feelings for their ex then they may continue their friendship with them.
Exes that decided to remain friends for practical reasons and civility fared better. Their friendships lasted for a longer amount of time and were considered positive as they made all partners feel secure and happy. For exes that remained friends for security, their resulting friendship was also positive. However, security reasons did not dictate whether the friendship lasted for a short period or a long period.
Suggested Reading: How To Break Up With Someone In The Fairest Way Possible?
Who Said Exes Can’t Be Friends?
When a study proved that 60% of exes remained cordial, what makes people say "exes can't be friends" ever so often?
A multitude of factors contribute to that and one of the main reasons is if the couple has a toxic relationship which results in a bad end. It is highly likely they would not want to be friends in such cases, would they? For former partners to remain friends, it needs honest communication and acknowledgement of the fact that their relationship is not working positively and deciding to part ways mutually.
Sitcoms like Friends, Parks and Recreation and so many other films etc have shown how exes that remain friends eventually reconcile and go back to being partners again. This hinders the belief that exes can maintain friendships; it makes people jump the gun and assume that one remains friends with an ex if you are still in love with them. The idea is further promoted by those around us and leads us into believing that staying friends with an ex is a bad idea.
Instead of letting dramatised television shows impact your decisions, exes should take stock of their relationship and decide whether or not a friendship is feasible.
The views expressed are the author's own.
Follow Us/shethepeople/media/post_banners/Z8Cxd3ZgqteUCrK1NrlO.jpg)
/shethepeople/media/agency_attachments/iUYfaBbcMozaYLoGnoov.png)
