Alia Bhatt once said in one of her interviews that she dreams about getting an Oscar rather than getting married. Now that she is married why do people think her dream of getting that Oscar is over? Why do people think marriage is the only way to find happiness and fulfilment in every woman’s life?
Marriage can be a big day in the life of a woman because it does bring in a lot of changes in their life. But we don’t put the spotlight on the wedding day of a man in equal measure, it is an important day but not the only thing they wait for all their lives. Then why do we expect women to think that way?
Alia Bhatt dreams about the Oscars
Alia Bhatt in an old interview told Pinkvilla, “I only think about that one day when I am standing in front of people, receiving an Oscar. What marriage is for most girls, an Oscar is for me.” She was further asked about her statement as it wasn’t what the audience expected to hear. She told Bollywood Hungama, “Actually the question was do you dream about the day you get married? I just said I dream about the day that I receive an Oscar. What I will wear for that, how I walk on stage, hopefully, I won’t fall on stage, give a speech, who all I will thank. All these things.”
Now that Bhatt is married to Ranbir Kapoor and announced their pregnancy, people took up the old interview to indicate that the actor might have forgotten what she said and that she might not be interested in the accolades anymore. But when were marriage and awards alternatives? If one chooses marriage they will give up on their dreams about their career?
Why are men never asked if their career will be affected by their marital status?
Alia Bhatt Oscar Comment: Is marriage everything for a woman to achieve in life?
It was very clear in the questions asked to the actor in the first place that the media wants to hear how a woman dreams for her wedding day because it is assumed it is their biggest moment in life. The narrative of the media to make people think that marriage has to be a woman’s most important event in life, makes their other achievements look insignificant. Because when a woman chooses not to marry, no matter how successful they become in their career, society looks at her as a lonely person who failed her family.
And the hypocrisy of the same narrative lies when a woman marries, it is considered that her career is over as she will not be able to contribute fully to her work due to household commitments. And several companies stop hiring women who are married thinking that they will not be focused, or need to go on maternity leave soon. The will to work and be successful is expected to be washed away once she gets married. Then why are men not subjected to these assumptions? Do they not have any duties toward their family? How can they excel in their workplace even after marriage and kids?
In the entertainment industry, people have seen several female actors leaving their careers for family and kids and sometimes not being allowed to by their in-laws and husband. But things are definitely changing, actors like Kareena Kapoor Khan have proved the assumptions to be nonsensical and how. She never let marriage be an issue for her career and worked through both her pregnancies, flaunting her baby bump and setting a trend. Similarly, people should stop speculating misogynistic ideas about other actors like Alia Bhatt who is still rising as a star.
A woman can get married if they want to and still be focused on their career and let’s normalise that.
The views expressed are author’s own.