Gym Bro Or Gym Crush: Who Fuels Your Workout 'Beast' Mode?

Yo rats, if you had to choose, what’d your gym tee scream today: “One more rep bro, I am watching you” in Vantablack or the wordier athletic heather version - “Shoutout to my gym crush for making me train 10x harder simply by existing!” Depends, I guess, whether you share the sweat with the “weights not dates” gym brotherhood or have succumbed to what’s popularly being called the intense “Mere Exposure Effect” of the gym crush.

What is it about Gym Crushes?

Psychologists explain it as “the attraction we feel to someone we see repeatedly at the gym where no prior negative or positive exposure is required to be drawn to them… simply seeing someone repeatedly, like at the gym, can make you find them more attractive.”

Now don’t say you haven’t been there, bruh! It’s simply an extension of the “familiarity principle” -- very human, very chill, very feel-good. It can’t always be the hustle about the muscle, right? Waiting for the gym crush to finally spot you is also a legit relationship status.

Adds some charm to the gym life loop of meal prepping – thinking gym – watching gym videos – talking gym – going to the gym – dreaming gym! Platonic or romantic, it makes you happy either way, just being in the shared fitness environment. Like a positive association that can even be triggered by the “mere exposure effect of a certain pleasant scent,” according to research. 

Ultimately, the motivation comes from within, but the external validation of the crush definitely fuels that oxytocin rush and the dizzying effect of phenylethylamine, especially in the “early stages of attraction.” The joy and reward chemical combo is like a potent pre-workout that improves mood significantly by hiking motivation, calming your chaos, improving focus and boosting confidence. 

The Reluctant Gym Rat (RGR) calls gym crushes a wonderful and wild force -- “those guys or girls at your gym that motivate you to run a little faster on the treadmill or do an extra set of squats just so you can stay in the area where they’re working out a little longer. You also secretly hope they’re watching you and appreciating your hard work and dedication.” Like the RGR, though many prefer not to actually approach the crush, scared of “bursting the bubble.” Love certainly can be “thrilling and nauseating” at the same time.

Gym Bros: The best hype squad

Then there’s the gym bro. And the sculpted by iron bond of bromance that fuels your muscle mass with its dependable consistency and long-term camaraderie.

Taking the gains forward, YMCA ascribes enhanced motivation, increased commitment, heightened enjoyment, form correction and safety, pushing limits, friendly competition and emotional support to the WO buddy. Even if part of the deal includes pushing you to do “one more rep coz she’s looking.”

Spending hours in the gym with bro chasing gains or perfecting form builds a healthy subculture centred around lifestyle changes and body aesthetics based on mutual accountability, not exclusive to men only. The sustained companionship, as opposed to “atomization” amps self-improvement and athletic sculpting. “The time (spent) with friends and teammates on the rugby pitch or in the gym is time well spent in the pursuit of community,” says The Stanford Review.

So, what is it then, gym crush or gym bro that does it for you? That pushes you to slay that WOD? Ace the leg day supersets? Max the AMRAPs in tune with Orquestra Maldita Funk BR?

Admiration of the physical appearance/workout style does work, as proven by Reddit threads that talk of the intense “short-term focus” associated with gym crushes, even if the admiration is one-sided. Others talk of the “complications” in taking such relationships beyond the gym and therefore strictly follow the “no talking to gym crush ever” rule.

On the other hand, when you see your gym bro (non-gender specific), ‘the primary hormone released is dopamine, often referred to as the feel-good hormone...  triggered by the perception of strength, fitness, or even attraction, which can activate the brain's reward system.”

It's bulking with bro vs killing it for the crush – what’s the real flex? What gives you the real feels? 

General consensus on the matter hovers around the wisdom that while the gym crush “can provide initial motivation, it is the gym bro who offers a more robust and reliable source of encouragement and support for sustainable and long-term achievement of fitness goals.” These endorphin enhancers elevate mood and reduce pain, and that’s the “swole” point of going to the gym!

As someone in my gym put it bang on -- “the gym crush gets you to the gym, the gym bro keeps you there.” Touche!

Pretty much sums up the debate, if there ever was one, on who’s BAE in the gym. 

Progress, it is said, isn't linear anyway, and most of it has to do with the self to begin with, when you get up and show up even on lean days; having a gym bro just acts like a healthy dose of T Maxx! And if there’s the crush to boost, many swear by Myles Erlick “MVP but she don't come to play” so …” worship, worship, show me how you work it!”

Only one way --

“Sweat
Sweat
Sweat
Sweat
Drippin' down like”

That feeling when you “barely had any sleep, worked all day and still manage to crush your goals in the gym!

Let’s get ripped rats, whatever does it for you -- gym crush or gym bro! Because at the end of the day, the only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen! 

Views expressed are author's own.