How Reading 'The Second Sex' Changed The Way I See The World

Gender roles and identity have existed since the dawn of mankind. The children are forced to behave in a certain way that attributes to their gender. Society pressure kids to internalise the negative social perception of gender roles. Male children should play outside rather than in the kitchen. Female should assist mother in the kitchen and learn household chores. Children who attempt to adopt the characteristics of the other gender are considered as having a flaw in their uniqueness.

Many boys and girls struggle to accept themselves because of the shadow cast by gender stereotypes, they experience an identity conflict. As children begin to suppress their preferences in favour of what parents view as the norm, the line between right and wrong becomes increasingly hazy. Being unique is occasionally a natural feature that a child is born with rather than a decision. Would a child ever be able to accept himself if they were told over and over again that their innate characteristics were flawed?

Teachings From The Second Sex

A staunch feminist writer Simone de Beauvoir addressed the gender and social conditioning. In her book, also known as bible of feminism, "The Second Sex", she says-

"One is not born, but rather becomes, a woman."

I've always admired de Beauvoir for being radical when in doubt rather than the contrary, but these days, radicalism of that kind is becoming rare. Her intention is to demonstrate that a variety of external factors mould women rather than making them naturally "feminine." She demonstrates how a girl is socialised to accept passivity, reliance, repetition, and inwardness at every step of her childhood. On the other hand, boys are expected to be robust and masculine in spite of fragile "just like girls".

There are many films that somewhat represents what Simone de Beauvoir is saying. Our pop culture's representation of women and the realities of our lives are profoundly linked. In addition, social behaviours frequently provide as inspiration for movies.

For instance,  Ki and Ka was successful in reshaping and modernising audience attitudes and breaking numerous social prejudices. In the movie, Kabir (Arjun Kapoor) manages the home while Kia (Kareena Kapoor) is the earner. The same as Pankaj Tripathi, he makes a brave decision. While his wife, a teacher, worked, Tripathi took care of the housework and attended auditions while he was trying to make it as an actor in Mumbai. Lipstick Under My Burka makes a point that sexual needs of a woman is a reality. The movie undoubtedly generated a lot of controversy. The movie highlights marital rape, shows that women are not rare cuts of meat, and emphasises how significant a woman's desire is on par with a man's.

So, dear parents, stop imposing gender roles on your children. They are able to assume any shape that is given to them. Let them shape themselves as per their preferences rather than turning them into another idol of patriarchal ideals. In order to enhance the next generation as well, it is crucial to be careful about the lessons we teach children. The next generation will be more inclusive and open-minded if parents start appreciating the identities and choices of their children.

Suggested Reading: Why do gender norms privilege men as leaders?