/shethepeople/media/post_banners/9eWererrQzNgl3o5To7W.jpg)
In our society, men are raised to not be emotional and refrain from crying as they are told that crying is for helpless and weak people. But is suppressing one's emotions and not showing people how you feel really the mark of a strong person?
Crying is not just an emotion, it is showing people a vulnerable side of you. A side that cannot contain the enormous feelings in you and needs to be vented to be controlled. Whether you are sad, happy or scared, tears show how strongly you are feeling those emotions and that is one of the reasons why it is seen as a sign of weakness. Men in society have always been kept away from any signs of weakness. From a very young age, they are not to shed tears and fight instead of crying over things. However, is this really a healthy upbringing?
Suggested Reading: Why Should Married Women Have Their Own Tribe?
Shaming Men For Crying
A Reddit user posted a story on the page @MadeMeSmile that was captioned "Hope to have an SO like this someday" and the story under it was about a guy who cried in front of a girl for the first time and it was his girlfriend. He was in a single-person study room in a library and missing his family when his girlfriend called him and she somehow knew he has been crying over the phone. She asked his location and ran to him and hugged him. She asked him to go to get some tea and talk about it which made him realise she was the one. They have been in a relationship 10 years for now and he said, "I've cried a handful of time but I know when I need to I won't be judged".
The story is a reminder for all those people who judge men for being emotional and crying when they feel like it. Crying is not a sign of weakness, when you have someone you trust, you can be emotional around them. For men, it is really hard for them to understand that crying is not a sign of weakness, it is just an emotion. But this happens because they don't have people around them who understand this. If they ever feel emotional and cry, people around them, their classmates, colleagues and relatives tell them crying is for weak and treat them differently.
It is natural that if you are not allowed to express happiness, sadness or overwhelming feelings and are expected to bottle them up, they will trouble you for a long time. It can create communication issues, anxiety, distrust and doubt in a person and that's what happens with men too.
It is hard for men to find people, whether friends, partners, parents or relatives who understand their emotions and their strengths and don't take them as emotionally weak for crying. Hence, it becomes really important to eradicate such stereotypes and make men feel comfortable with expressing their emotions as suppressing them has a very drastic toll on their mental health.
Men should also know that if a person has a problem with them crying and expressing their emotions, the problem is with them, not you. You have the right to express your feelings the way you want, you can cry and be strong at the same time. Being emotional does not mean you cannot fight back. And if there is someone who does not understand that, then they better keep their distance from you. But you should not bottle up your tears for others.