#Opinion

Conflicts? Here Are 8 Tips For Dealing With In-Laws

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Dealing with in-laws: Women especially in India are usually conflicted when it comes to living together with their in-laws after marriage. Even though starting a new life with your partner is exciting, the apprehension that comes with the thought of having to live under the same roof with your in-laws can be difficult to deal with for some women.

Communication is the key. One should have very clear conversations with their life partners to know what is expected before they embark upon this lifelong journey. Remember that your in-laws are people very close to your husband. The stereotypes that have been propagated especially between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law, can make breaking the ice difficult. To help you adjust your relationship better, here are tips for dealing with in-laws.

8 tips for dealing with in-laws when you live under the same roof:

Try to understand their patterns

Keep in mind the differences in ages, traditions and customs and thought process no two families are the same. First, make sure you and your partner are a team.

Do not take part in the power game

Many Indian households play the so-called “power game”. Simply put it is the dynamics between the mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law competing for the husband/son’s love and attention. If you feel you are unwillingly getting drawn into it speak to your partner first. He is at a better place to talk to his mother.

Create healthy boundaries

As humans, we all have things we adore and things that just tick us off. Therefore, it’s important to create healthy boundaries from the beginning that will solve your misunderstandings with your in-law. And again, this can only be achieved with proper and thorough communication.

Communicate and negotiate

Instead of constantly talking behind each other’s backs and telling other people about the problems between you and your in-laws, it’s important to address the elephant in the room. Communicating your problems out loud can be a boost for your confidence too, as it let people know where you stand and what your opinions are. You can converse with them about what can be done to solve the issues at hand.

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Picture Credit: Hum Tum / Screengrab

Don’t expect anyone to be perfect

Perfection cannot exist in any household and we’re all aware of that. It’s important to know that we are all humans with flaws. Your in-laws can make mistakes the same way you can. Both sides should know when to step back and overlook other’s mistakes, understand each others weaknesses and flaws instead of judging each other for them.

Don’t take everything to heart

Maintaining a good sense of humour can sometimes save you from a tight spot. Having said that do not compromise on your self-respect. The most important thing to remember is that your issues with your in-laws should not affect your relationship with your partner.

Don’t hold onto grudges

When problems become unsettled for too long, anger turns to bitterness which leads to grudges. Keep communication channels open. Sitting together and finding a solution to let the hurt is the best way.

Make an effort

You see the other person is making an effort, try meeting them midway.

Views expressed are author’s own


 

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