With a mature social media post, that was less an announcement and more an ode to friendship, Sushmita Sen proved that relationships that run their course don’t necessarily have to do so on a bitter note. Amicable breakups are real and possible. The 46-year-old actor on Thursday posted an Instagram selfie with former beau Rohman Shawl after reports surfaced of the two having parted ways.
“We began as friends, we remain friends!! The relationship was long over…the love remains!!” Sen wrote, with hashtags ‘no more speculation’ and ‘cherished memories.’
Sen’s post was rather unexpected and wonderful because rarely does an actor as prominent as her walk into the spotlight and confirm or refute buzz around something as personal as their romantic lives. But Sen, a longstanding inspiration for women everywhere, has always taken a route off the mainstream. She embraced motherhood through adoption in her 20s, dared to subvert the ‘age rule’ in relationships by dating a younger man and is an icon for living on her own terms.
It is then no surprise, when one comes to think of it, that she made her breakup public in the most dignified manner.
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As first reported by ETimes, citing a source, Sen and Shawl had ended their three-year-long relationship, prompting Shawl to move out of Sen’s home where he lived with her and her two daughters, Renee and Alisah. Rumours of their breakup had earlier surfaced in February but the couple had, it was believed, appeared to confirm they were still together after they were spotted out and about in Mumbai.
When we think breakups, the first thoughts are never about amicability. For years, we have heard and seen of couples parting ways with hostility. That seems like the only natural, plausible option when the relationship breaks for reasons that are hurtful; when one partner cheats, for instance. It is futile to sermonise that breakups in such cases should be friendly because really, can they ever be? Is there room for making accommodations when one partner breaks the trust of another?
This is subjective and has no right or wrong answer.
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But that does not mean all separations are painted with the same brush. Even without discounting the wounds that fester, many in relationships today are choosing to keep their calm and wits about them when taking stock of the status they are at. “Okay, where do we go from here?” Clear-headed decision-making, though difficult, becomes imperative at moments like these when the objective is to palliate further heartbreak as much as possible.
And then there are couples who opt for mutual separations, cutting across the general perception that two former partners cannot continue to be friends long after the ship of romance has sailed. Does this make the circumstances of love more uncomplicated? Perhaps. Is everyone equipped to take this high road? Absolutely not.
Modern relationships, however, are attempting to break the mould. Love is a happy place and is accepting of variations – casual dating, long-term bonds, marriage, singlehood, passionate crushes. The experiences are limitless and non-limiting. The end of one road does not mean the journey has ended. It simply means another exciting adventure awaits around the corner.
Views expressed are the author’s own.