Thirty Things No One Told Me About Long Term Relationships

To be honest, I assumed that all relationships are supposed to be long term relationships. Little did I know that emotions wear out and love flies out the window.

What really remains is a choice. So do you want to go the long mile with your significant other ? That is the ultimate question and before one gives an answers there is a whole other box of possibilities one needs to go through.

The heart break is mostly inevitable but once you make up your mind to spend your days with someone you absolutely adore, you become ready to take the fall. Or you don't and that is when you know that you are not ready for something serious and long term.

Relationships are tricky. Looking at people celebrating their three year, four year or 58 year anniversary on social media, many of us get the feeling " I wish I had someone to celebrate that with". But is that a good thing? Is being with someone for a decade means a decade-long happy spell of love support and growth? Not always. Long term relationships make people go through long term struggles also.

Here are somethings I wish I knew about long term relationships:

1. Not everyday will you love your partner
2. Your love language will not be the same as your partner
3. Lofty ideas of storybook romance will not stay for long
4. You will have to accept your partner's flaws
5. Your interests will not be the same as your partner's and that is okay
6. You will have to respect your partner's boundaries
7. You should have something that you enjoy on your without your partner tagging along
8. You will grow beyond your 'type' and stick with someone who feels like home
9. Some fights will seem like the end but they won't be
10. If you can't trust your partner now, you might never
11. Even after long years together, marriage won't seem like a plan and it won't be a bad thing
12. You can enjoy doing nothing together.
13. You should always give each other the space to grow
14. Breaking up is not always a bad ending of a relationship
15. Good sex does not always mean good relationship
16. In order to keep things fresh and healthy, you and your partner will want to try new things together
17. You must support your partner's career and celebrate their achievements
18. Somedays, your partner will need all your emotional energy
19. Somedays you will have to make yourself a priority no matter how your partner feels about it.
20. You will have to always ask for things you want in your relationship if you don't get it otherwise
21. You should listen to your partner's complains about you without getting defensive
22. One of you will have to control your anger in order to solve what's troubling your partner.
23. Ordering or choosing what to cook will most days be the most important issue
24. One person cannot drive the relationship, it needs team effort.
25. Getting attracted towards a third person is not a bad thing unless you act on it without your partner's consent
26. There will be a time when career and your relationship will be one two different sides
27. Your upbringing play a huge role in your relationship.
28. No match is made in heaven, they are by chance.
29.  Tough times will become easier with the support of your partner.
30. Love will feel real. Always. Either for yourself or your partner.

Views expressed by the author are their own.