When Memes Go Misogynistic: How Online Humour Shapes Gender Attitudes

Scroll through Instagram, Twitter, or even your family WhatsApp groups, and chances are you’ll come across a meme that makes you chuckle, until you realize the joke is actually at the expense of women. From “crazy girlfriend” memes to “gold digger” templates, meme culture has quietly become a playground for casual misogyny. And because it’s all wrapped up in humour, speaking up makes you feel like the one who “doesn’t get the joke.”

“It’s Just a Meme” Doesn’t Make It Harmless

Sexist memes often hide behind the idea of “just for fun.” A guy rolling his eyes at his girlfriend’s shopping, a “starter pack” making fun of women who wear makeup, or the endless “women belong in the kitchen” jokes, these memes hit because they play on stereotypes we’ve all seen before, painting women as demanding, emotional, or superficial. The more these jokes keep circulating, the more those stereotypes start to feel normal, and even obvious.

Stereotypes in Your Scroll

Think of the viral “Overly Attached Girlfriend” meme, where a woman’s wide-eyed smile became shorthand for clinginess, or the endless reels showing marriage as a man losing his freedom to a controlling wife. In India, this often shows up in WhatsApp forwards that joke about “shaadi” being like jail, memes about wives emptying their husbands’ wallets, or alimony jabs. Another example is the notorious “Spoilt Modern Indian Woman” meme trend, where women were mocked for being independent, but later flipped the script, using satire to call out sexism.

One of the most frustrating things about sexist memes is how easily they hide behind irony. If you point out the sexism, the response is almost always, “Relax, it’s just a meme.” That “just joking” excuse makes it hard to push back and often silences women who speak up. Misogyny finds its way in silently when it can hide behind layers of irony and the laughter of everyone around.

This kind of humour isn’t harmless. A 2022 study in the International Journal of Psychology by Catalina Argüello-Gutiérrez found that people who see sexist jokes regularly, especially men, tend to find them less offensive and are more likely to hold sexist beliefs. In other words, the more these jokes circulate, the more we get used to everyday sexism without even realising it.

The study also showed that women, even when they notice how offensive these jokes are, still feel their impact, highlighting how repeated exposure to sexist humour shapes social attitudes.

Memes might seem like throwaway content, but they shape the way we see each other. They spread quickly, stick in people’s minds, and often sneak into conversations offline. A sexist meme shared a thousand times isn’t only a joke; it reinforces a way of thinking where women are reduced to punchlines.

Bollywood, WhatsApp, and Everyday Sexism in India

In India, meme culture often leans on Bollywood tropes. Jokes about the “shaadi-obsessed ladki” or memes based on item songs that reduce women to their bodies reflect broader cultural attitudes. Even family WhatsApp groups aren’t immune; uncles forwarding jokes about “shaadi pressure,” dowry memes, or funny takes on household roles are part of the same environment.

On the other side, scenes like Rajisha Vijayan’s fiery retort in the Malayalam film Freedom Fight have gone viral as memes too, this time used by women online to call out and push back against misogynistic dialogue in cinema.

Flipping the Script: Women Reclaiming Memes

Women are reclaiming meme culture, turning the script and using humour as a tool for resistance. Feminist pages on Instagram and Twitter are doing exactly the same, mocking patriarchy, calling out workplace sexism, and poking fun at the absurdities of gender roles. Memes about “mansplaining” or “emotional labour” really hit home because they reflect women’s real experiences instead of ignoring them. At the end of the day, humour can be a way to push back.

Meme culture doesn’t have to be mean or harmful toward women. It can still be funny, relatable, and something people actually want to share, without being sexist. But that means we all need to pause before we laugh and hit “share.” Are we spreading humour, or are we spreading harm?

Memes aren’t only throwaway content anymore, they influence how we talk, relate to each other, and think about gender.

At the end of the day, memes can either keep patriarchy in place or help tear it down. The choice comes down to who controls the template, who writes the caption, and who decides the laughter, at women’s expense, or with women’s voices leading the joke.

Views expressed by the author are their own.