Why must Indian women be benchmarked to sanskars?
There is something about the Indian society and the way they define the good girls or ‘Sanskari girls’. The Indian society is so obsessed with the mannerism of a girl. Most of the time, her ideal behavior is judged and linked to her sanskars.
‘Being Sanskari’, is a phrase which is used to describe or rather rate a woman on whether or not she exhibits the ideal qualities of a ‘cultured woman’.
What do we even mean by Sankari? Doesn’t this sound like a really funny question? ‘Being Sanskari’, is a phrase which is used to describe or rather rate a woman on whether or not she exhibits the ideal qualities of a ‘cultured woman’. A sanskari woman has a list of courses of dos and donts. In this patriarchal society and the mindset we live in, there are set of restrictions which women have to face. If she doesn’t follow those rules, she is considered not an ideal woman.
Is it unsanskari if a woman wants to go out at night to build her career? Is it unsanskari if she also wants to go out and explore the world around at night? She should get married at the right age. She should be at home before 8 PM because that’s what sanskars are all about?
And any woman will get tired of these incessant taunts by the family to become that ‘Ideal’/ ‘Sanskari’ woman?
How can you even judge her tendency by linking to her sanskars? She should be aware of the household chores because she needs to be sankari. Is that all sanskars about?
Be nice and polite all the time. Being a girl, you cannot raise your voice. Looking back at the history, we can derive how much women have suffered because of the mindset of the society. But, my dear girls and women, we can’t let this happen anymore.
Whatever we do, is completely our choice. Women too have their emotions and decisions. The society is nobody to implement it’s set of restrictions on her.
Stop asking her to be sanskari. The number of tattoos, the number of male friends she has, the number of piercings she possesses tells nothing about her behavior. Asking a lady to behave sanskari is imposing harsh restrictions on her and imprisoning her thoughts and her body.
Society has related its own meanings of being sanskari. Before asking for a sanskari bahu or a sanskari girlfriend, ask your sons to become a sankari man first?
We have reached a time when we are struggling to create an equal place for our girls. It is a question for the society itself, “Can we stop wanting women to be sanskari?” Spare a thought.
Indian society and even Indian films like Cocktail have been teaching all the women the same thing, not to cross the boundaries and not break rules ever in any case. But, being sanskari also means standing up against the wrong.
We have reached a time when we are struggling to create an equal place for our girls. It is a question for the society itself, “Can we stop wanting women to be sanskari?” Spare a thought. Females do deserve better.
Deepali is an intern with SheThePeople and these are her views
Image Credit: Autumn Goodman, Unsplash