'At 40, I Am Comfortable Making Mistakes': Amruta Bendre On Midlife Clarity, Growth

Menopause isn’t usually a topic that takes space in headlines or stages. But at Fabulous Over Forty Bengaluru, Standup Comedian Amruta Bendre, aka Momic Amruta, turned the platform into a hilarious commentary on midlife, empowerment, motherhood, and self-love.

Owning Forty Like a Badge

When asked to give menopause a “genre,” Amruta didn’t hesitate. “It would definitely be a thrilling comeback,” she said. And if anyone can make menopause, mood swings and midlife chaos feel like a comedy ride you actually want a ticket for, it’s her.

Before 40, I was making a lot of mistakes and at 40, I’m comfortable making them. -Amruta Bendre.

Amruta expressed, "After 40, I love my mistakes. I embrace them. I know mistakes are a way to learn... After 40, I have learnt this sense of carefreeness, which is very refreshing. People might mistake it for carelessness, but it is just clarity." 

Amruta pushes back against the stereotype that women over forty are 'angry'. “There’s a difference between anger and clarity. One is an emotion, the other is cognition. We are just becoming clearer people now.” 

Evolution Over Reinvention

Did she reinvent herself? Not quite. “Reinvention is too much pressure,” Amruta laughs. “In my profession of comedy and of saying things, there is nothing new left to be told or discovered. It just goes in cycles. Going back to what works and what did not work… that’s evolution for me.”

Comedy itself was a discovery. Though naturally funny among friends and family, standup to an audience of strangers was a revelation.

It started with posting one-liners on Instagram during the COVID-19 lockdowns. One of her classics, “Why is South Indian coffee better than North Indian coffee? Because it’s filter coffee, duh.” Simple, silly jokes became the launchpad for her stage persona.

Even when asked why men in their 50s and 60s are celebrated, but women are overlooked, Amruta had the perfect clapback, “Nahi, I think I look amazing in my 40s. It’s all about what you think about yourself.” Her advice for women? “Stop panicking. Put one thing in front of another. It’s a state of mind.”

Takeaways and Lessons for Every Woman

Amruta has always thought about normalising periods and menopause for the next generation. She believes that their parents’ generation, especially her own mother, who features in a lot of her standup comedy, was cutely clueless about parenting.

She recalls one incident when she got her first period and how her mother explained, “You see that beggar woman on the street, and Queen Elizabeth… every woman gets it. Nobody escapes. Go to school”

Now, Amruta has flipped that script completely. Her mantra for parenting is simple: "I think about what my mother would do, then do the exact opposite," she jokes.

So when she finds her daughter scribbling boys’ names on a piece of paper, she doesn’t scold. Instead, she leans in and asks all the important questions: “Who is he? What’s he like?” 

Further, she stated that her goal in life is simple. Connect with more and more women and make them laugh. She talks about feminine issues from changes in mothers' bodies, bladder control, and much more, without shame. And her audience? Women who finally feel seen, heard, and validated.

On ageing and self-perception, her advice is "cliché," she admits. But it is profound. “Age is just a number. Start looking at yourself through your own eyes, build your own perception…use yourself as a weapon. Be lethal. No need to shame ambition. Put your jigsaw puzzle together.”

At the Fabulous Over Forty festival, Amruta Bendre proved that life after forty for women is not a crisis. It is actually a stage (sometimes a standup comedy one).

She brought moments so relatable that every woman who consumes her content is ready to own their forties and the years ahead with unapologetic flair.

Views expressed by the author are their own.