What Does It Mean To Be Wife And Daughter Of A Soldier?
I remember the dialogue of a not-so-old Bollywood movie, Raid which starred Ajay Devgan and Ileana D’Cruz in the main lead. In one sequence, both of them were having a conversation where Illeana was motivating her husband, Abhay Patnaik (Ajay Devgan) to not lose hope while performing his duties as an Income Tax officer. To this Abhay replied, “India ke officers ka nahi, balki unki biwiyon ka bahudur hona jyada zaruri hai.” (Indian officers are not needed to be as brave and bold, as their wives.)
The film in a certain way projected the valour and bravery of Abhay’s role but what’s needed to be deeply appreciated and was overlooked was Ileana’s part. Let the film be what it was. But, talking about the real-life incidents and attacks, to which our soldiers are always vulnerable to is a frightening thought. One can say that they are the saviours of the nation and they are performing their duties, but what about their wives and kids who hardly get to see them. The Pulwama attack that happened on February 14, 2019 united the whole nation and sparked major controversies and widespread provocation in the whole nation as well as in at international forums.
“Yes, it’s scary, I fear for his life, especially when he’s posted near border areas but to think that my husband is doing something for the country fills my heart with pride.”
However, coming back to the dark emotional tunnel, to which the wives and the bereaved families go through, it, is just difficult to describe their loss in words. There are certain insecurities clinging to the very fact of having your husband and father in the army, be it of any nation. SheThePeople.TV talked to the wives and daughters of a few men who are serving the nation for years and here are their responses.
Sachi Tripathi whose husband is in the defence forces said, “There is a constant fear that maybe next time he’ll be in the news.”
“The country and the government will praise him as martyr or will even give incentives, but no incentives can fill that empty space ever. People will talk about it for one or two days and will move on with their lives but it’s the family who’ll suffer forever,” she adds.
“It’s difficult to understand when you are young, the reason why dad couldn’t make it for Christmas or Diwali, but gradually with time you understand that you can’t have the privilege of seeing your dad every night, because it’s different to be a defence brat,” says Sachi Tripathi’s daughter, Divya Tripathi.
“Life in the Army is very different, fun and at times difficult as well. I have changed 10 schools altogether. I know how to adjust to my environment better, I’ve made friends in every corner of the country and I’m at least mildly acquainted with the traditions of these places. While the adventure part is also fun but it’s sad that year after year my father has to be away, and sometimes when he’s posted at the border it’s kind of scary. All in all life in the Army is something different from the life of others, it shaped my childhood, I don’t think I can ever describe it in words,” said Sayani Rakshit, daughter of Shrabanti Rakshit.
“Yes, it’s scary, I fear for his life, especially when he’s posted near border areas but to think that my husband is doing something for the country fills my heart with pride.” Shrabanti Rakshit said.
“The country and the government will praise him as martyr or will even give incentives, but no incentives can fill that empty space ever. People will talk about it for one or two days and will move on with their lives but it’s the family who’ll suffer forever,”
“Having your husband in the Army is a different feeling. For years we’re apart but the short span of time when we’re together is very special,” says Shrabanti Rakshit, whose husband is holding the post of a Lieutenant Colonel.
With these remarks, it is enough to conclude what they feel. But, what we can do the least is to stand together with them and always keep their morale high. We are able to sleep peacefully because they are awake.