Relationships took a backseat through 2020 and the time has now come where people feel comfortable moving on in finding partners, starting families and settling-in to love. Matchmaking services have seen an interesting uptick in business as people look for normality once again. Headquartered in New York, Vows for Eternity is a bespoke and personalised service that caters to global millennials, and has an established presence in Bombay, Delhi and London.
“Most individuals that join Vows for Eternity have spent time on an education, their profession or business, and in this process, have not had the time and opportunity to meet like-minded people like themselves.”
In conversation with Anuradha Gupta, the Founder CEO where she talks about what it takes to bring two people together in 2021.
What makes someone approach and join Vows for Eternity?
I believe that there is never a ‘right age’ to get married, but always the ‘right time’. The decision needs to come from within, and I understand that it’s never easy coming to a matchmaker when so many millennials feel that they should find their partner organically. Most individuals that join Vows for Eternity have spent time on an education, their profession or business, and in this process, have not had the time and opportunity to meet like-minded people like themselves. This is where Vows for Eternity comes in. Our process is about finding and bringing on board members that have come to this juncture after much introspection.
How do members decide which tier of membership is for them?
As a service, I would like to help anyone that feels they are ready to find “the one”, because people are at the heart of what we do. We never use biodatas to determine who a person is, and instead focus on mindset, values and personality. Conversations lead us to understand the nuances and complexities that each search entails. Our experienced team brings expertise without judgement and are confidantes to members through their journey.
Our Premium membership caters largely to professionals who are happy to lead their own search with the help of my team. When it comes to our signature service – The Privilege Suite, personalisation is taken to a different level. I am involved in every step of their journey and handhold them through what is a very private process. The level of confidentiality we offer in all tiers of membership is what individuals and their families value, as we make every effort to understand their very personal criteria.
How do members decide they’ve found “the one”?
I think there comes a realisation that this is not just a person you can live with, but someone you can‘t live without. Two people must have the maturity to know that the person they are with today will be different five years from now. With time, people evolve, and so should relationships. Marriage is very fragile, there is a lot of work in progress. I think both people should be invested in each other’s growth. This, in my mind, is the point where most people want to commit to marriage. There will always be interesting people that will cross your path, but if you find someone that brings you happiness, companionship, friendship, and above all, love, you’re on the right path.
A couple has to find what works best for both people, and that is what we advise all our members – Anuradha Gupta, Vows for Eternity
How do you define a successful marriage?
I think that marriage is a safe-space that two people share. Introspection is really important for both people and they need to understand the difference between what they really need and what they want. This is what separates the fundamental from the superficial in every search.
Trying to change someone to fit into your idea of a “perfect partner” never works. So when you love, learn to love the person with their flaws because I think by virtue of being human, we are all intrinsically flawed. I think acceptance of your partner whole-heartedly, as they are, is what makes for a successful marriage.
Marriage is a leap of faith on every level – Anuradha Gupta
Do you think it is always a woman’s responsibility to give up her life, her career and move where her man is?
A lot is changing, but traditionally boys have been raised to be the breadwinners of their family therefore their focus on their careers is very skewed. Girls today are brought up with the best education and opportunities to pursue careers of their choice, and it is time to change the underlying tone of them playing a supporting role in family structures. Traditionally, men wanted to feel safe and secure in their ability to provide, but that has now begun to change. That change has come with how we bring up our children, raising them to understand equal career opportunities with an equitable home environment.
I really don’t think decisions should be made unilaterally when it comes to choosing geographies in a partnership. A couple has to find what works best for both people, and that is what we advise all our members. I really hope in generations to come this is not a subject that hinders strong relationships from moving forward.