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I Fell In Love With Ashish Despite The 17-Year Age Gap, Says Debleena Sen Chadha

"There’s nothing abnormal about getting married to someone who is older and has a child. It’s high time we normalise such things." Says Debleena Sen Chadha on her marriage with Ashish Avikunthak.

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Bhavya Saini
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Debleena Sen Chadha
Bengali actor and model Debleena Sen Chadha has worked in films like Na Manush Premer Kothamala (2021), Ghost of the Golden Groves (2019) and Jaatishwar (2014). Her 2021 film Glossary of Non-Human Love, originally, Na Manush Premer Kothamala had been screened at the International Film Festival Rotterdam (IFFR) where it also received many awards. The film had been directed by her filmmaker husband Ashish Avikunthak. Sen Chadha discusses how she never let the age gap between the couple get the best of their relationship. Read here.
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Debleena Sen Gupta is an Indian actor and model who works predominantly in Bengali-language films. In 2019, she tied the knot with her much-older lover, filmmaker Ashish Avikunthak. Speaking with SheThePeople, she revealed that she also shares a cherishing bond of friendship with his teenage daughter. Sen Gupta broke the age barriers to establish a strong connection with her husband despite all societal expectations. Read her captivating story below.

"The first person I connected with in Ashish’s family was my step daughter Iravati. It was 2019 and we were getting married in July so she could fly down to India. ‘Debleena never take them off’ she said while I was wearing the churas. I chuckled, ‘You sound as if you’re my mother in law’.

Rewind to 2013 when I met Ashish for the first time, things were really complicated. He was a filmmaker & I was casted in his film. He was going through a divorce. That’s when I met Iravati- for the first time, she was just a little girl. ‘Do you know how to do make-up?’, she asked; I laughed & said, ‘Sure I can try.’

During the shoot we felt a connection. We slowly opened up to each other and one day I confessed, ‘I think I am falling for you’ He was really shy and didn’t say much but I could make out from his reaction that the feelings were mutual.

We had an age gap of 17 years but I wanted to give us a chance; Within a few weeks we started dating.

Few days later Ashish left for work. We would skype-he was awkwardly unromantic; Being old school, I would say, ‘I want you to write love letters to me…’ and to my surprise he did.

In 2015 when Ashish was visiting me. I told my mother about us; She had a hint of things and was fond of him. ’It’s a complicated relationship and society will talk; be careful.’ she said.

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A year later I wanted serious commitment & Ashish wasn’t ready. We stopped speaking for a few months but we missed each other. In 2017 we moved in together and decided to give it another try. We were like a family, Ashish, Iravati & I would spend time together.

Soon, Ashish proposed & the next day we were at the registrar's office. It's been 3 years now, and he still writes to me when away. I am often asked things like- ‘You are so young, why are you marrying a divorcee who has a daughter?’ but this never affected me or any of us.

There’s nothing abnormal about getting married to someone who is older and has a child. It’s high time we normalise such things. When my friends would say, ‘Looks like you’ve already got a ready-made daughter.’ Iravati would be like- are you calling her my step mom?? That makes her sound like an evil witch. No way, she is my friend."

Debleena Sen Chadha
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