To be or not to be

It’s 5 am and I have been up for the past 3 hrs. wondering why I am feeling so uneasy , especially when its been good the past few days. Staying positive, living in the moment and not taking any feeling too personally. So why now?
Is it because my purpose is missing ? Am I someone special ? or am I no one special?
As she wrote this she continued with her affairs. Attention & food. Her righteousness doesn’t stop her from being a kleptomaniac. Her vices she refuses to change , but wants a change within. She loves her children , but not enough to spend constructive time with them , but enough to make them feel like crap about themselves. Does this woman deserve peace ? or sanity ? or purpose ? or maybe just a reason to live?

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