Every Indian woman is bothered about living with her in-laws after marriage because of the stereotypes about them. But the relationship between Sameera Reddy And Manjri Varde proves to turn this around.
Sameera Reddy, who is married to businessman Akshay Varde shares a great bond with mother-in-law Manjri Varde. They laugh together, cook together, make fun content for social media together and even work together. The two women work together to change the narrative of Saas Bahu relationships and prove with their bond that Sassu Maas and Bahus are not always in conflict as they are stereotyped, propagated, and portrayed to be in soaps and dramas.
Here are 7 Saas Bahu Lessons From Sameera Reddy And Manjri Varde
Nobody Is Perfect
It is important to know that nobody is perfect in any relationship. No relationship, no matter how good, is not always going to be filled with fun and laughter all the time. No Bahu or Sassu is perfect or always right. This is where proper communication is important. Communicating properly makes the other party understand where you stand. “It’s taken us a bit of understanding, a bit of back and forth. I’ve stepped back, I’ve stepped forward. It’s really give and take.” said Sameera Reddy.
The Power Game Is Not Worth It
“In Indian households, it’s a power game between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law,” said Manjri Varde. It’s true that the power game makes the women of the house compete among each other even for the smallest things. It assumed that it is either the daughter-in-law or the mother-in-law who has the upper hand in the household. “I have been single and independent for many years so there was no power game in our house. It was open to everyone” said the Sassy Sassu on how she stopped these stereotypes in her home.
Understand Each Other’s Patterns
The duo also said that it is important to learn how to bend a little bit for the other party. Understanding each other’s strengths and weaknesses, sensitivities and confidences are very important in maintaining a healthy relationship. “She walked my way a little bit and I walked here where today I understand her so I realise where her reactivity comes from. I always understand what her intentions are and what patterns she is trying to break. She understands my patterns in return,” said Reddy. After all, a relationship only works when two people understand each other.
Do Not Fuel Negativity
Unsolved problems tend to make us bitter on the inside. We often hold on to grudges when our problems and anger become unsettled for too long. “The biggest issue in most Saas-Bahu relationships I’ve noticed is that the Bahu will go and absolutely chit-chat to the friend and complain about the mother-in-law,” said Reddy. The Messy Mamma suggested that confronting the problem right on works much better than keeping it in and further fueling the negativity. “We need to find a solution. We cannot sit here and fuel the negativity” she said.
Create Boundaries In A Way To Solve Issues
As humans, we all have certain boundaries in our lives. We have things we are open to and things we are against. Aside from being open to understanding where the other person comes from, it is equally important to know how to create boundaries in a way to solve issues. The Saas-Bahu duo teaches us that to maintain a healthy mother and daughter relationship, boundaries can be created to solve issues without it giving rise to worse issues.
Importance of Financial Security
“Let’s be honest, we as women don’t think about this but it matters,” said Varde. For every woman, if there is that financial security they also gain a sense of independence and confidence. Varde said that it was never an “Oh my God, you have to stay with me” thing for her when it comes to her son marrying someone. She said that she does not feel the need to say, “She’s taking my son away” at all because she’s also independent and happy by herself.
Reddy also said that the daughter-in-law should be equally independent on her own. A daughter-in-law does not have to be defined by the mother-in-law, the husband, or anyone else but herself.
Respect Goes Both Ways
There are still things that I’m sure I get on her nerves and she gets on mine as every family does. But you have to find a way to understand the intention” said Reddy when she talked about her bond with her mother-in-law. The actor also said that it’s not an easy thing to form a new relationship that is strong and comfortable and you have to work on it every single day.
“You don’t have to touch my feet but if you make sure that there’s food on the table which I like and you don’t like, that makes a big difference,” said Varde while she complimented her daughter-in-law for always making sure that everyone is always comfortable. We learn that respect goes both ways in every relationship, not only a Saas Bahu one.