Do Women Bear The Burden Of Extra Chores Simply For Being Effcient?

The burden of household chores can be backbreaking, especially in cases where women are responsible for them singlehandedly. However, while navigating the pile of washed and dried clothes waiting to be folded and arranged in the cupboard one might wonder, why is there never an end to the do-list that we women wake up to? Could the reason be that women always bite more than they can, or rather, should have to chew? Is it because we are trained since an early age to be efficient, thus giving our partners, an opportunity to slack off?

I know of working women who wake up before dawn to ensure that the lives of their loved ones is convenient even while they are gone. They'll fix everyone's breakfast and lunch, they'll help kids arrange their school bag and push them to get ready on time, they'll even load the washing machine, iron clothes required by each member, polish shoes and make beds. It is not as if they can put their feet up once they are back from work- same ordeal, different chores. Homemakers have to perform these chores and more, because "din bhar to tum ghar me hi rehti ho" is seen as a valid excuse to dump unpaid work on women across households.

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There's another reason why women end up with most of household chores- they are seen, or condtioned to see themselves as experts at performing these duties. She is the one can make sabzi so delectable that you'll lick your fingers later, why should the family settle for anything less? She knows the monthly kirana list by heart, so it is better for her to go to the supermarket and buy it, why bother sending someone less efficient to do the chore? No one can fold clothes or iron them as neatly as she does. The shoes have a better shine, the uniforms look crispier when handled by her. She can do ten chores in the time that it takes you to finish one. She is an expert, why should he, the husband, even bother.

Turns out that for women, their efficiency is their biggest undoing. But then, what makes us so efficient? Were we born multitaskers, or is it something that is enculcated in all girls since childhood? Weren't most of us told to help out in the kitchen, or do odd jobs like drying out the washing when we were young? We managed these chores alongside our extracurriculars and studies. We were taunted, encouraged to be efficient, because that's what makes you a great mother and wife. Being inefficient is not even an option for women. How many families raise boys by the same standards?

This is not to say that boys should be taught to strech themselves beyond their limits, but simply that they should be encouraged to feel efficient and to share the burden of household duties, believing that they are their responsibilty, as much as they are of their partner. No one is efficient by choice, but then women should also have to option to be able to depend on their partners to take care of half the chores around the house. Only then will they be able to not see "ineffciency" as a shameful trait. Only then will they check on their tendency to go over and beyind while performing household work.

Household chores shouldn't be about efficency, they should be about equality, kindness and care. So who is caring for women in the household?

Views expressed are the author's own.